So this weekend we were enjoying some family time in front of the TV, watching The Pregnancy Pact - a Lifetime movie that I DVRed that none of you should watch, ever, because it is beyond stupid, when we started discussing the fact that I blog and that I have many Internet friends that I prefer to him and he was like "You still do that?"  And I was mortally offended, obviously, and he said that he wanted to read it.  So I let him.

OMG, this is what happened.

So I am sitting in front of him (like, two inches away, so as to inspect every facial expression and nuance, etc.) waiting for his laughter, tears, and the renewed realization that I am actually the woman of his dreams...



And more crickets....

Finally, he says "I went to a real Ivy.  Why did you put it in quotation marks?"

So then I punched him in the face, moved Bink and I out, and now we're roaming the countryside as hoboes on the rails, learning, living and eating beans in cans.

Fine, we're not.  But I was furious!  He begrudgingly admitted some things were funny, but I know the truth.  He's just mad because I'm the funny one and he's the one everyone likes.  Whatever, Husband.  You and your "IVY" (!!!!! what a snob!) can suck it!


  1. I can identify. Everyone thinks I'm funny except for my husband. I'm thinking of trading him in for a newer model who "gets" me. :-/

  2. Right? You ARE the funniest, obviously.

  3. No, YOU are the funniest!

    That gives me an idea. Let's divorce our husbands and marry each other! Does your State allow that? We'd have the best marriage EVER, sitting around watching Happy Endings and listening to The Party...we could watch old Party videos and learn the dance moves...send John Stamos (not at all creepy) letters and fan art. Drink a lot. Heaven.

  4. OMG can you imagine?! It would be awesome. Dude, the only thing you can't do in MA is buy booze before noon on Sundays. Or, like, a lot of other times. John Stamos! He has some sort of new Lifetime movie coming out this Saturday. I cannot wait. Sigh... we really would be perfect spouses. And I would let you borrow my flowery hats! Fine, I don't really have those, but we could get them!