Today we went to the playground with a bunch of Bink's little friends. It's the nicest day of the year and while Bink does not overly love the playground, I thought she would love to see her friends outside of preschool, run around a bit, and enjoy herself.

Well, she did not. She spent the entire time clinging to my leg, whining, eating goldfish and interrupting the other mothers. I reprimanded her about 599 times, and she shook her finger at me but kept her mouth shut.

Until the final time, when she hit me in the face.

It was not a real hit, it is the kind of hit that Bink (and probably other kids) do that is very light, so it doesn't actually hurt, and she can pretend it isn't a hit, but she still means it as a hit, so it counts.

So I picked her up and took her home immediately. Of course at this point she was having a full-on meltdown, but I brought her to the car anyway and we came home. She was screaming, crying, shaking her finger, the whole thing. I asked her why she thought we left, and she said that she didn't know, of course, but then we talked about what she did and she apologized and howled some more.

And then my anger dissipated, and I started to feel BADLY.

Like, so badly I have a heavy feeling in my chest. I made her cry. I took her away from her friends. And I know she cares not at all now, an hour later, but I feel like junk. And if someone told me this, I would tell that person that of course they should not feel badly, that kids have to learn and sometimes you have to do things that suck to get your point across.

But I still feel guilty.

What would you have done? What have you done in situations like this? I don't know if there is a middle ground, where we could have stayed and she would have understood the ramifications of what  she did. Is there? She's a really good girl so I don't want to make a mountain out of a molehill, but hitting is a mountain, isn't it?

Tell me what you would do and stop me from eating bagged shredded cheese while sobbing in the fetal position on the bathroom floor.


  1. Mine also hit me in the face last night. I took away his beloved buzz light year that he got for his birthday which of course led to crying and a meltdown...and I would do it again!!

  2. I completely agree with the reaction to the hit. Not ok. Never ok. Will never get you what you want. Always bad bad bad. But one thing that I was thinking as I read what lead up to the hit and how maybe she didn't want to be there in the first place, and what maybe could have been down before the hit occurred. I don't know her, but my guess is maybe she is introverted? And perhaps found the playground overwhelming? Being married to an introvert and having one of my sons follow suit, I can relate. Did you describe, with details, what was going to happen on the outing and was she voicing complaints before you left? I'm not justifying her hit, as I said, your reaction to that was dead on, but maybe for the future, she was trying to tell you something well before it. And that's not to say don't force her out of the house sometimes, but I've found with my introverts, they need some prep time and some time to feel safe/comfortable in mixed company. Don't eat that bag of shredded cheese- you are a great mom!

  3. You know, Alannah, I was thinking the same thing. I know she doesn't really like the playground, she doesn't do sliding and jumping and climbing, and this time, all of the kids were all over all the toys, so it probably bummed her out. You are totally right, I should have helped her more, probably, and then she wouldn't have been as out-of-sorts.

    YOU are so smart! But I already ate the cheese... :) xx

  4. Being an extrovert myself, it took me a LONG time to learn how to deal with the introverts in my life. I couldn't NOT understand them. Why in God's name would you not want to be surrounded by people all the time?!!? Thankfully, for my marriage, I get it now :) And it can be super helpful having an introverted husband because he is more than happy to stay home with the kids and let me go out :) Win-win! I'm sure she will gain more confidence as she gets older, but in the meantime, meeting her halfway to get there will help, I'm sure. Best wishes!!

  5. You did the right thing. Please don't feel guilty about it. To make you feel better... imagine the most mis-behaved child you know (and we all know one)... the kind of child that makes you want to jump out of a window... and realize that Bink is NOWHERE near that bad.

    So you are doing something right.

    {{BIG HUG}}