I WANNA EAT IT!

Okay, so today I got a manicure-pedicure.  I do this every so often, and today I had a Groupon, so why not?  This is why not:

1. When I was walking in, this crazy girl MUSCLED past me to get ahead of me in line.  She picked two colors that were too close to look different and too different enough to look nice and I hated her for life and gave her the stinkeye for 45 straight minutes. 
2. It was a small place and there weren't enough people so it took FOREVER and the woman kept getting up to answer the phone and stuff and it was annoying.
3. A man ended up doing my manicure after my interminable pedicure (OMG how snobby do I sound?  It just took forever and it was hot in there and I wanted to be done) and he wanted to make small talk.  I am way too shy for small talk, so it was awkward.
4. Obviously this is the part where I tell the story that I really wanted to tell.  This poor man was talking away and I was just sort of half-listening and he says "Love your necklace."  I say "thanks."  He says "It looks so good I WANNA EAT IT!"

...

...

... did you want me to repeat that?  Because that IS what he said and I couldn't leave because he was only half done and my horror and mortification was so obvious that he thankfully refused to make eye-contact with me for the remainder of the appointment.

I WANNA EAT IT!

I am STILL embarrassed for him.